BRIGHT LIGHT

DREAMING TO BE SOMEWHERE ELSE

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The music and the poetry were the driving force in my spiritual walk, and they made decisions easier to make. I had been gifted with a rich sense of dreaming, and also from being brought up around music and musical instruments. My father, Leonard Zapf of Zapf's Music Store of Philadelphia, was a gifted musician and instrument technician. I had any instrument at hand at any time growing up with the music store. And although I studied classical piano, and violin, the guitar made the most sense to me, because of how easy it was to write a song. And I could put my heart and poetry into the guitar. This is when I wrote the song Bright Light.

QUITE SPOT

I took a drive in my 1970 VW Beetle, down a country road called Creek Road in Bryn Athyn Pennsylvania. It was a very private road that was basically deserted and had an old train track running through that was no longer in use. It was one of the most peaceful and quiet spots. I could get out and do a little hiking and writing. It was one of those sun-filled moments when I knew I had to grab the day and breathe the fresh air. Sat down along the side of the train track and wrote this song. It was immediate. And the Bright light of life blessed me that day with an amazing sense of peace. I felt as though I did not have to try to figure it all out. Just find my heart, and keep trying to follow it come hell or high water.

I realized that I had no time to mourn after David's death. I had to pull myself up by my bootstraps and make some hard decisions about my life. How I was going to love again? When I think about my whole seemingly tiny life growing up in the Suburbs of Philadelphia, dreaming of whom I would like to marry at kindergarten age, then making a plan, David didn't seem to notice me until I was much older, like age 15! And through all that the unexpected happened, at my ripe old age of 20.

NO LIVE PLAYBOOK

Now I was thinking, "how will my life play out?" "Should I plan anything ever again?"  What was I going to do for work and for play and how would I keep myself balanced, after all, I had learned from my time traveling across the country, free and alive! All of a sudden I was learning about death, I did not want to learn about grief. I didn't want to grieve. Not at age 20!  I really felt that David flew off to some planet, or was it heaven? Or an idea of heaven? I had never really had any concept of what that would be like.

The thing is, that with David gone I was feeling as though I was going to start making excuses for why he wasn't here anymore. Why he just disappeared? I was afraid of thinking too much. And so I found my new direction in writing more poetry, and songs began to flow out of me. This would be my new route to healing. Because even though I could not find the answers to "why", I began to get interested in what was available to me in the deeper meanings of life, and so my Spiritual walk had begun.

MOVE ON

My song Move On truly was written along the lines of shaking free from grief. I was stifled by having to move on literally. After spending time in about 8 years with a Church group, I began to grow outward, wanting again to learn others' experiences with how to move on and grow more inward, to find the realness of what my heart wanted to love and be loved needed.

To give more? To take more? All I could keep coming back to is that this was a great big huge dynamically run orchestra of life and we were all the players. The dynamics of the music we were all playing in could be felt and acted out. Though there were many I met, who did not see things this way, I had to respect that they had their own interpretations which served them. Yet holding the truths which embraced me in all of my stumbling awkward moments, I found a way to move on.

Bright Light - Bright Light Lyrics

We’re just here to help each other
Father, Mother Sister Brother,
someone’s going to come to you
to tell their troubles to.
Now you might try to run for cover and
Find yourself another lover
but don’t forget there’s not much time
the end could come too soon.

Bright Light of Life keeps on shining in you,
I almost forgot what I came here to do
Love is a season that’s waiting in you
Just keep your heart steady
And your dreams
will come true

Now you've got a heart that’s as good as gold and you’re
sharing with me all that’s been told to you
Guess you’ve got a right,
you’ve been running a long long time.
But I get this feeling you’ve been here before, and you’re
finally coming back for some more,
like something was lost in between,
maybe something I thought was mine.
Bright light of life keeps on shining with you
I almost forgot what I came here to do
Love is the season that’s waiting in you
Just keep your mind steady
And your dreams
will come true

My song Move On truly was written along the lines of shaking free from grief. I was stifled by having to move on literally.

After spending time in about 8 years with a Church group, I began to grow outward, wanting again to learn others’ experiences with how to move on and grow more inward, to find the realness of what my heart wanted to love and be loved needed.

To give more? To take more? All I could keep coming back to is that this was a great big huge dynamically run orchestra of life and we were all the players. The dynamics of the music we were all playing in could be felt and acted out. Though there were many I met, who did not see things this way, I had to respect that they had their own interpretations which served them. Yet holding the truths which embraced me in all of my stumbling awkward moments, I found a way to move on.

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Move On Lyrics

Somebody’s telling me I am a fool,
preaching and praying and not acting cool,
I’ve got my reasons and I’ve got my rhymes,
but the spirit is calling for me to move on,

MoveOn MoveOn MoveOn

So many things in this world I could do,
but I’m trying hard just to listen to you,
now the TV is on and it fills up my time,
but the spirit is calling for me to MoveOn,

MoveOn MoveOn MoveOn

Spirit, you are my life you are my everything
spirit you are my life you’re my urge to sing,
spirit you are my life you are my everything,
Spirit you are my life and you are my wings